hello, how is it going guys? It is a month (more) already since the first day of 2021 but, to be honest, I haven't felt any significant changes yet. Last year somehow a bit blurry and I'm not sure how to describe it. It supposes to be the last year of my coass, but then.. we have corona. Except for the fact I lost so many great teachers and family members, I don't hate corona that much. My bad.., I guess I don't hate quarantine that much but, corona still sucks. I'm lucky enough I don't have to think much about financial problems caused by corona. As I'm writing this, I'm at a café, paying like Rp 37.000,00 for a cup of cafe latte where I could make it by myself at my house for Rp 0,00. I don't really think about saving money and stuff. Now I'm thinking back how much money I have spent on something I don't need or people who taking me for granted. I should have given it to people who actually adore me.
What else did you learn from 2020? I learn something really important by the end of last year (in December to be exact). Great Gods took me on Their side again for good. Letting me met such great people who taught me "we would be never be asking too much, you are just asking the wrong person" and it feels rewarding to cut off people who dim my light right now. Also, They taught me a great lesson by sending another guy from my past again in 2020, who (I have to remind you) made me lowering my worth back then, and asking (madly) to God "what the fuck do You plan for my future". I was so heartbroken, but damn I proved to God, I'm a lot smarter than trisna in 2018. It was rough but I get a hold of it. I told my whole family about this, letting them read the messages, contacting all my closest friends asking for support. And man, I'm so grateful to have them (and of course I spilled the tea to my insta bestiesss on close friends lists, real-time ;)). Now from the deepest of my heart, I wish him to get HIV AIDS (+) for having sex with a lot of girls at once (he told me his first time were in high school at his parent's house.. geez :")). I'm grateful I don't give my "first time" to him (since you know..we could be really stupid when we were in love). And to be honest, I may just stay a virgin until I knot a tie to a well-mannered man who actually matches my standards (like for real). However, I'm not rushing, I'm a complete human being already :) having a partner means it's the extension of my happiness, not "someone who completes me" :)
I promised to take care of myself a lot better than I used to. Not only mentally, but physically too. I have been working out for 45 minutes every day for the past 2 weeks. Having a private thread mill helps a lot since we can't go out as much as we used to. I don't change anything from my diet, but I do be more cautious with everything I put inside my mouth. Hmm, what else.. ah, I have been studying hard too!, like almost 4 hours a day (hey, that's a lot for a lazy ass like me) even my family wondered how could I survive medical school so far with the bare minimum, like hey! that's pretty amazing if I have to be honest :) just imagine I'm doing most of it since my fresh year, haha.
So many great things happened to me and my family in January, and I'm happy to say "I found myself in the place where a lot of people lose me", and I believe that the greatest thing yet to come this year. In May I'm going to take my final examination to become a real doctor, and I'm pretty sure life is going to be a lot better and better as I try to love myself more. Haha, I don't know what to say, but yeah... I love my life so much recently :) and I'm thankful for the bad and good people who crossed my life to teach me how great is my life :)
